Express & Star

Peter Rhodes on vulnerable windfarms, reticence at the restaurant and a much-recycled old lady

And off to the Indian restaurant to pile on a few more layers of insulating blubber before the bone-chilling, pensioner-freezing winter arrives. At least that's my excuse.

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Smithy – poetry at the take-away

At times like this I always envy Smithy (James Corden) in the BBC's Gavin & Stacey. In 40-odd years of ordering Indian food, I've rarely ventured beyond the safety of balti and biryani. Smithy rattles off his order for an array of exotically named platters from the take-away with the speed and assurance of an auctioneer: “Chicken bhuna, lamb bhuna, prawn bhuna, mushroom rice, bag of chips, keema naan and nine poppadoms.” Almost poetry, isn't it?

Talking of shivering OAPs, a colleague has coined the rather indelicate term “frozen-granny hunt” to describe the inevitable media scrum to find the first pensioner succumbing to the cold after losing their winter fuel payment. While the hacks are working on that story and before any photos become available, I can recommend the ideal illustration.