Rhodes on war crimes, Saxon drama and the perils of disposable barbecues
Read the latest column from Peter Rhodes.
I'm loving the latest season of The Last Kingdom, the bloody, raunchy and utterly gripping Saxon drama that began life on the BBC and was then taken over by Netflix. What a great loss it is to the Beeb.
As a rule, The Last Kingdom takes history and itself seriously, but there are occasional moments of whimsy. When King Athelred murders a servant, he is upbraided by his adviser Aldheim: “Lord, you can not simply execute subjects as you please. This is the ninth century.”
Meanwhile, the Ukrainian war turns nastier by the day and rivals in savagery anything seen in the Dark Ages. And if you're hoping that ordinary Russians will one day turn against Putin, heed the words of a mother whose two soldier sons died fighting in the Russian army: “The war was necessary. We had no choice. If we didn't bomb them, they would have bombed us.” The sad truth is that while the civilised world is revolted by Russian aggression and blatant war crimes, most Russians share this mother's view and Vladimir Putin is still popular with his people.
Single-use barbecue grills may be heading for the dustbin of history. The Home Office reckons these tinfoil boxes of charcoal are responsible for four per cent of serious accidental fires. As a nautical friend can confirm, portable barbecues can cause problems in the most unlikely of places. At low tide, with her boat resting on the muddy floor of a harbour, she set out a few barbecues, dined and drank well, and fell asleep. She awoke to find the tide rising and her barbecues, still glowing red-hot, drifting towards some moored boats like tiny versions of Francis Drake's fireships. Only her swift action with a bucket prevented a fiery re-run of Calais, 1588.
As well as demonstrating how to make crisp sandwiches, as described in yesterday's column, actor Jamie Dornan also told a US chat show that no Irish person would refer to St Patrick's Day as “St Patty's Day”, a term popular in the States but which is considered offensive by many in the Emerald Isle.
I wish him luck with that. I once wasted several minutes trying to convince a group of Americans that, whatever their media told them, Prince Charles and Diana were never, ever referred to in Britain as “Chuck and Di”.