Cathy Dobbs: Party games are all too much

Our MPs are coming across as sugar-fuelled tantruming toddlers - and watching them is like being stuck in the children’s party from hell.

There’s Rishi trying to snatch Truss’s job away from her and you can almost hear him scream: “It’s my turn.” It’s causing such a furore that others are joining in and Truss is starting to look so defeated she may just run off crying.

There’s pass the parcel, which has been renamed ‘pass the buck’. And don’t forget pin the tail on the donkey where you blindly try to get your aim right, just to fail miserably. There is excitement one minute and tears the next - but you want to end on a high so you have a go at the Tory Cokey. Not heard of it? Well, it goes, you put your budget in, your budget out, in out in out shake your debt about.

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Looking at the alternative with Labour seems so much brighter. The idea of taking rail, mail, water and energy into public ownership seems ingenious. After all, look at public services such as the NHS, police and education which are all efficient, well-oiled machines and the envy of the world.

You know that if you call an ambulance it will be there in minutes, and waiting lists – what are they? With the police you can rest assured that if someone breaks into your house they will have caught the culprit by the time you sit down to breakfast the next morning. And don’t get me started on education – it’s an absolute dream. With a system that puts children first and each pupil is taught as an individual according to their strengths, not just a 'one size fits all' approach.

What would be next for Labour with their fairytale manifesto? Maybe invisible trains and mail delivered by flying pigs?

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As I said in my last column, we are in need of a radical shake-up of the education system. If teachers refuse to give up holidays then spread them out across the year. Maybe switch to four-day weeks, with one day a week for teachers to catch up on marking and planning. Also, ditch most of the paperwork and get the teachers to focus on what should be their priority – teaching children.

Lastly, get rid of Ofsted – a word that sends most teachers into a panic. Isn’t it a shame that successive governments have turned what used to be an amazing, inspiring job into one that is stress-filled? Although they have done the same to nursing – two jobs destroyed by successive governments that are supposed to serve us, not torture us.

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However, we could soon be saying the same about train drivers and postal workers. Another two jobs that children aspire to from an early age will become about as appealing as being a tax inspector, a portable toilet cleaner or the UK’s prime minister.