Woman's mission to help bereaved children

Diane Clarke was only 10 when her whole life changed in an instant after her father killed her mother in 1978.

He was later jailed for three years for manslaughter.

It left her battling with PTSD as well as feelings of abandonment, guilt and shame.

As Diane grew older, she dedicated her life to working with traumatised children and supporting victims to recover from toxic relationships.

She is now in the process of setting up a charity, called CatchU, which aims to ensure children bereaved by a domestic homicide receive the care, support and advice they need to handle their loss and overcome their trauma.

Diane, who previously lived in Cheslyn Hay but now lives on the island of Gozo, near Malta, has published her own story to raise money to get the organisation up and running.

In her book, she recalls her memories of the aftermath of her mother’s death and how the circumstances surrounding her loss impacted her life in later years.

In the introduction, she says the book is “about my loss and confusion in a world of prejudice and exploitation and the changes that are needed to support the rights of the child”.

She believes little has changed, since her own loss, for children who experience this type of family tragedy.

“Little is known about these children’s outcomes in the aftermath of fatal domestic abuse, they are bereaved of one parent and the other is responsible for their death.

“I want to provide a safety net to catch forgotten children and help them reach their full potential,” explains Diane, who is qualified teacher.

Her vision for CatchU is to run therapeutic programmes for children in Gozo, including activities such as horse therapy, arts and pottery, swimming in the sea and bike rides.

At the moment, she is in the process of applying for charity status and is crowd-funding to help get the services up and running.

“Putting the sunshine back into children’s lives is what CatchU intends to do. By providing advocacy and support for themselves and their carers, there is a chance that healing can take place and where better to have a therapeutic programme for children other than Gozo, the sun shines most of the year and it’s a very spiritualised place,” she says.

“To heal from trauma we will offer a non trauma focussed therapeutic holiday. There is no need to be retraumatised, to feel safe and calm, or to manage their emotions, actions or decisions.

“Providing support, warmth, empathy, and insight in the present moment, will build their resilience to cope with stressors and the real life events of the future. Left untreated, complex PTSD symptoms can worsen and have long term consequences on their health and well-being, economic and social outcomes.”

Raising awareness of this kind of trauma is also important to Diane and part of the charity’s work would be to ensure the views of these children are always represented.

“I want CatchU to be reachable. This takes away the feeling of abandonment. When a child’s dad kills their mum, that stigma and silence is a lonely place for a child to be. I want to be an advocate for these children so somebody can stand up for them. I also want CatchU to be respectful. The children are the ones that know what went on in the house. I want us to be restorative and try to repair the damage that has been done and help the children to become resilient. I want them to treat us like a member of the family,” explains Diane.

Diane’s book, Daughter of a Murderer: A True Account Of A Child Bereaved By Domestic Homicide is available from Amazon with all proceeds going to CatchU.

For more information about CatchU see www.facebook.com/CatchUhs