'I thought I was going to die': Miss Black Country speaks out about her mental health
"There were times when I thought I was going to die. I've come through some very dark days and never thought I'd be the person I am today."
The words of Miss Black Country Jade Secker, who has revealed the torment she has suffered as a result of mental health issues that have dogged her for the last four years.
On the face of it Jade is an attractive, intelligent young woman with everything going for her. But her story is one of battles against anxiety and depression, of severe weight loss and panic attacks.
"I've had a lot of people say they are surprised I've suffered with mental health," said Jade, aged 24, from Wombourne.
"Severe anxiety, panic attacks and depression are just a few things I have experienced over the years. Some days I didn't even want to leave the house."
Jade said she first started suffering from anxiety while in the final year of a Psychology degree at the University of Worcester in 2012.
"The feelings came out of the blue," she said. "I started to have panic attacks in lectures and having to go home. I would start to shake, my chest would tighten and I felt like I couldn't breathe."
Jade said she eventually scraped through her degree by working at home and one-to-one sessions with tutors, but her mental health continued to deteriorate.
"I pretty much became housebound and even the idea of going to the shop to get a pint of milk was terrifying," she said.
On one occasion she flew home early from a holiday in Cyprus due to being consumed by anxiety.
"I was under doctor supervision for being drastically under weight," she said.
"In Cyprus I was hit with this consuming feeling of anxiety, panic and entrapment – I couldn't cope any longer. It cost me £400 to get a flight to Manchester as there was nothing to Birmingham. I just had to get home. One of my friends had to pick me up from the airport and take me home. It was an ordeal."
Jade decided to open up about her problems after she was inspired by national Time to Talk Day, which ran last month.
Organised by Time to Change – a partnership between the charities Mind and Rethink Mental Illness - the campaign revealed that although one in four people are affected by mental health problems, the majority still struggle to talk about it.
It aimed to move as many people as possible to 'break the silence' by discussing their mental health issues.
Not being able to talk about an illness, be it depression, anxiety, schizophrenia or anorexia, can be one of the worst aspects of the experience, according to Time to Change.
Around 60 per cent of people surveyed by the group said that stigma and discrimination were as damaging as the symptoms of their illness. The day saw around 90,000 mental health-related conversations across the UK, with nearly 13,000 in the West Midlands.
"The Time to Talk campaign was great," said Jade. "People got talking and were comfortable enough to speak out about their issues.
"I tried so many different options, like therapy, but nothing was working. Eventually I faced up to the fact that it was a big problem and went on anti-depressants for a short time.
"I'm not completely over it but I'm a lot better now. Whenever I get anxious I tell myself that I am strong enough to get through this."
Former Ounsdale School pupil Jade said she has been overwhelmed by the huge response she received from the public, with messages of support and even some people saying she had even inspired them to talk about their own troubles.
"It's been beyond incredible to see the response," said Jade, who works as a community funding officer at The Haven Wolverhampton.
"I wanted to come forward with my story, not so much for myself, but to help other people and make them realise they themselves can overcome similar issues and prove they can really turn their life around and achieve anything they put their mind to."
The campaign has also seen numerous celebrities reveal the extent of the issues surrounding their mental health problems.
They include Stephen Fry, who has experienced mental health problems for much of his life. At the age of 37 he was diagnosed with bipolar disorder.
"I'd never heard the word before, but for the first time I had a diagnosis that explains the massive highs and miserable lows I've lived with all my life," he said. During research for his documentary 'The Secret Life of The Manic Depressive', Fry said he was dismayed to discover the extent of prejudice surrounding mental health problems.
"I want to speak out, to fight the public stigma and to give a clearer picture of mental illness that most people know little about," he added.
TV presenter Trisha Goddard spent time in a psychiatric hospital as a result of her mental illness. She described it as more difficult to deal with than when she was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2008.
"Both experiences were horrible," she said. "But with breast cancer, people ran towards me with open arms and hugged me. With depression, people ran away.
"In time, I really hope attitudes can change."
And former England international cricketer Marcus Trescothick said facing up to Australia's speed merchants was nothing compared to facing his depression.
Jade, who is the eldest of five children, said: "I have gone on to achieve amazing things. Winning the Miss Black Country title in May just made me realise, I found ways to cope with mental health, and so can anyone else who suffers problems.
"We are talking about a hidden illness. So many people were shocked when they heard my story. When you hear celebrities and sports stars have been through similar issues it help give you the confidence to come through. Hopefully by speaking about it will encourage many others to do the same."
