Kirsty Bosley: A fortune-ate publicity stunt or generous souls? I'm just not sure
Rich people get a bad rep in society. When I talk about the 'top one per cent', I do so with annoyance. I've always felt as though they're the baddies, with their yachts, private planes and big houses.
All while we're here, grafting and feeling guilty if we spend the money we've worked to earn. I have been stopping myself from spending £17 on one single eye shadow all year because heck, rent is expensive, and I never really wear eye shadow anyway.
Perhaps it's down to jealousy. Maybe my problem with that one per cent is that I'm not in it. It just makes me feel sick to my stomach knowing that the richest one per cent of the world's population now owns half of its total wealth. FIFTY PER CENT.
I found that out on Fortune Magazine's website. That's the magazine responsible for putting out the Fortune 500, which lists 500 businesses that are doing better than the business you work for, probably. It definitely lists 500 businesses more powerful than any company you or I could ever imagine creating anyway, let's face it.
Fortune – that's how much everything costs and how much I don't earn. A flaming fortune.
So can you imagine the trap-smacking shock I encountered when I came across an article on said site this week, telling me that there are millionaires ASKING to pay more tax.
No, really. I know, sit down.
"Nearly 50 of New York's wealthiest residents are asking for a tax hike," the story told me, and if I wasn't perched on my swivelling work chair, I'd have fallen on my Tesco Value-powered bottom.
"In an open letter sent on Monday to Governor Andrew Cuomo and the New York state legislature, the one-per centers urged New York to pass a new, permanent tax plan for those in the top one per cent of the state's income threshold.
"The proposed plan would replace a temporary 'millionaires tax' set to expire at the end of next year."
I wheeled back in the swivelling chair. What do you mean, they want to permanently raise their taxes? Is this a mock site? Like The Onion or The Daily Mash? I checked the date, still a week away from April Fools. This is real, I realised.
Those signing the letter include rich people like Abigail Disney, Leo Hindery and Steven C. Rockefeller. Yes THAT Disney family. And yes, that Rockefeller.
"The letter's signatories called for their increased tax dollars to go toward pathways out of poverty and investments in infrastructure," it continued.
"The letter – which was organised by the liberal Fiscal Policy Institute and the Responsible Wealth Project – pointed out the record levels of homeless families and child poverty in New York State."
I was reeling. In the letter, the signatories said: "As New Yorkers who have contributed to and benefited from the economic vibrancy of our state, we have both the ability and the responsibility to pay our fair share.
"We can well afford to pay our current taxes, and we can afford to pay even more. Our state needs to invest this revenue in our struggling schools, in anti-poverty measures and in infrastructure improvements. Our state's long-term economic prosperity depends on strong investments in our people and our communities."
All at once, I felt like I'd been plunged into a work of fiction. This was great news! Rich people want to share the wealth? Woo hoo!
"As a businessman and philanthropist and as a citizen of New York State, I believe we need to invest in our people and our infrastructure," said Leo Hindery, the managing partner of InterMedia Partners, a media industry private equity fund.
"The one-per cent tax plan makes it possible to make these investments, and simply asks people like me to continue to pay a higher tax rate, as we should."
Sounds great, doesn't it? Does it? Something doesn't feel right. . .
While I'm not suggesting that the businessmen and women that make up the upper echelons of the world's Fortune Whatever are self-serving, or that they don't truly want to make a positive difference to their home state, I have to ask: what's in it for them?
Some of this top one per cent have friendships with leading politicians, business deals with some of the most powerful people in the world. They ARE some of the most powerful people in the world.
In 2008, Mr Hindery was an economic and trade advisor to Barack Obama, and it doesn't get much more influential than that. He sees money the likes of which I cannot possibly fathom.
I wonder whether this open letter is a real, brilliant idea to benefit everyone, or just a canny PR stunt to make it look like they're giving more than they really are. Isn't it just akin to me throwing 20p to a homeless person every month, and then going on Facebook and telling the world how completely generous I am for being so kind and giving? A million pounds in tax isn't much when you earn billions, is what I mean.
My friend Tim says 'there's no such thing as a selfless act'. And while I don't presume to know the exact reasons behind why these super-rich people are truly taking the decision to ask for a tax hike, I can't help but question some of their true motives.
As I was writing this, I decided to look further into what these top earners do for a living. There were so many buzz-terms knocking about with some of them: investment this, corporation that, equity fund the other.
How are you supposed to look beyond face value when there's so much jargon bandied around? Are we supposed to? Or are we expected to just sit down with a can of Coke and watch Britain's Got Talent, quietly?
It's just bewildering, I find. But that's politics in a nutshell – stuff silly little old me can't understand. So how could I question it?
Sometimes I think I've got an OK handle on what's going on in the world. And other times, I feel like something's strange but I'm not quite clever enough to work out just what. Sigh.