Childbirth: It is not something for young eyes
There is always a sense of foreboding at the news Jamie Oliver is bringing another child into the world. 'What children's fiction, cabbage patch name will they think up for their unfortunate offspring?' Is our first thought.
But Jamie has surprised us all with his latest birth controversy. No he hasn't called his baby son Chrysanthemum, Heineken or something silly like Trump. This time he is hitting the headlines for allowing his eldest daughters to be present at the birth of his fifth child – reportedly cutting the cord!
According to midwives, this is becoming a bit of a new craze with parents wanting siblings to be part of the 'experience'.
As a mother of two, I suggest that anyone who tells you giving birth is a beautiful experience has either never been there, was particularly high on the pain-relieving drugs or is in denial.
In reality there is blood, sweat, pain and tearing – yes actual flesh tearing. Too much information? If it's difficult just reading it, what's it like for a child to witness?
The aftermath of childbirth is carnage, not unlike the scene of a road accident. I often wonder why your other half would want to come near you again after watching the trauma – which let's not forget can go on for hours!
Fortunately my children's births were fairly swift – the benefit of having child-bearing hips! Undeniably, holding your baby in your arms for the first time is a magical and life-changing moment. Part of which is the feeling of relief that the pain is over.
Cutting the cord is a necessary medical procedure just like stitches. I can't understand why anyone would take delight in this surgical process. If it has to be symbolic, surely the person who does the cord cutting is severing the child from its mother and ending that physical bond. Quite a responsibility for your eldest child.
Parents dragging their other children into the birth experience argue that it helps the family to bond, prevents older children becoming jealous of the new addition and promotes a positive message about the birthing process.
On the other hand, they may resent the new addition that put their mother through this painful and messy episode or may never want to have children of their own.
As ever, mother knows best and only parents can really judge when their little one is ready to learn about life experiences. This might be when they can be left alone for the first time, what time they have to come in at night or when to have THE talk about the birds and the bees.
Personally I think there are some things in life we can all live without seeing – watching somebody else give birth is one of those.
By Diane Davies
