The alternative end-of-season Wolves awards
Wolves correspondent Tim Spiers dishes out some alternative end-of-season gongs for the 2015/16 season.
Shortest-lived chant
"Dicko, Afobe, Ojooo, it's magic, you knooow."
The unseemly public spat award
February 10, Kevin Thelwell: "Benik was no longer trying to play for us and that was undermining everything we were trying to achieve."
"It wasn't the Benik we signed. Everybody could see that in the performances."
February 10, Jez Moxey: "The reality is that he didn't want to play for Wolves."
"He wanted to leave, his advisors, his agents, his family...did everything they could to get Benik out of the club."
February 11, Benik Afobe: "This is too shocking and very hurtful.
"Some people at Wolves are hanging me out to dry to save their own backs but I won't let my reputation be tarnished. I'm a pro and wouldn't disrespect my team-mates."
Sweetest moment
The vast majority of pitch invaders want to gleefully show off their private parts, or incite opposition supporters. Or both.
At Huddersfield, one Wolves fan just wanted to give Carl Ikeme a big cuddle.
The big keeper reciprocated. It was emotional.
Dougie Freedman lifetime achievement award
A poster advertising season tickets in the Wolves club shop...
"This is his father's love, like his father's before, watching Billy then Bully, The Cat, Doug and more."
Doug, was of course, a misspelling of Derek 'The Doog' Dougan, and not a startling re-evaluation of Dougie Freedman's Wolves career.
Social media indiscretion award
For sheer chutzpah Rajiv van La Parra would win it hands down with this on Instagram: "One week they love you. Next week they hate you. Both weeks I got paid."
You stay classy, Rajiv.
Bright Enobakhare deserves a mention for tweeting a picture of himself shopping, while AWOL.
But for a pure "I actually cannot believe you just did that" moment, Kortney Hause takes it with his Snapchat leaking of the new 2016/17 home and away kits.
Forty-eight hours later he was dropped by Kenny Jackett.
Sour grapes award
Bristol City boss Lee Johnson, unhappy with Danny Batth not kicking the ball to their keeper before Wolves' last minute winner in March.
"I am an angry man. I thought a big club like that, you don't expect them to have to resolve to unsporting behaviour."
Cruellest nickname
'The Nord who hasn't scored' - Bjorn Sigurdarson
The 'actually...in hindsight...' award
Moxey, September 16: "Trying to replace a player like Sako is nigh-on impossible.
"We bought Jed Wallace and Sheyi Ojo to try and fill Sako's gap."
That would be right-winger Wallace, and untried teenager Ojo.
The mixed messages award
On the controversial Richard Stearman sale...
August 29, Jackett: "It is a football decision."
September 2, Jackett: "The thing that changed it was the bid and the size of the bid."
September 15, Moxey: "We didn't want Stearman sitting on the bench."
October 7, Jackett: "Centre-half is where (Iorfa) started as a youngster but, no, I think he's worth persevering with as a right-back."
October 21, Thelwell: "We were faced with a really difficult conundrum where you've got two England under-21 internationals (Iorfa and Hause) who can play in that position."
The 'make your mind up' award
A dead heat, this one.
Steve Morgan, August 4: "I do feel Wolves are in as good a shape as anybody. Sir Jack said I'd had a heart transplant to Wolverhampton and I think it's a bit more than a heart transplant – it's a whole body transplant."
September 28: Puts the club up for sale.
Kenny Jackett, July 13: "Bjorn Sigurdarson isn't part of my plans."
January onwards: Plays Sigurdarson 15 times, often as the main striker, while starting Joe Mason, signed for £3m, just nine times.
The 'no tears shed' award
Antony Kay, released by MK Dons last week.
Unfortunate club statement award
August 19: "Neither Benik nor any of Wolves' first team forward players will be sold this season."
The 'battle cry on deaf ears' award
Moxey, October 2, post-Morgan resignation: "We could use this opportunity to create an even more challenging environment (at Molineux) for the opposition as the team battles for every single point."
Questionable sponsor award
Three contenders.
1) E-cigarette firm Vivid. The US Government has just banned under-18s from smoking e-cigs due to their addictive attributes. A two-month sponsorship deal with Wolves included "sampling opportunities".
2) Then there's gambling firm BetBright, forced recently to apologise after sending a Good Friday email to customers saying Jesus "would probably frown on you betting on a holy day, but he's been dead years".
3) But The Money Shop, with its 729 per cent APR, takes the gong.
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